The AM Forum

Perhaps as a result of being retired now and having more home time on my hands I made this net list, some are real, some are new ideas:

The Whisper Net – only whispering allowed, best with high power and good conditions.

No Traffic Traffic Net – check in QRU and pass no traffic.

The Swap Net – one man’s junk is another man’s treasure.

The Piss & Moan Net – gripe about anything, controlled net.

The Old Man (T.O.M.) Net – everyone talks like they are 95 + years old; Hiram might appear.

Piss Weaker (QRP AM) Net – run your low power rig - 47, 6V6, 6AQ5, 50C5, 2N3553, rice box, Retro75, Nouveau 75, etc.

Hyellowy Audio Net – put your worst sounding rig on the air.

Homecoming Weekend Net – over Thanksgiving weekend, how many AM’ers check in total?  _._

The UFO Net - report things you saw in the ‘60’s and ‘70’s when you were under the influence.

Help Me Adjust My Audio Chain Net – Endless back and forth on tweaking the compressor, mic equalizer, different mics, noise gate, limiter, reverb, modulator gain, SDR transmit bandwidth, “I lost my configuration”.

The Interference Net – how many slop bucketeers, sweepers, vulgar CW, 3 kHz BW white noise, RTTY’ers, can we attract in the course of the net?

21st Century Hellschreiber Net – what creative waterfall display can you transmit?

The Oatmeal Net – breakfast along with the morning show.

How about the Stream of Consciousness Net? You drone on for 20 minutes about a topic that no one asked about, and then end it by saying "Let me keep it moving..."

Ummmm... I thought these were all on the air now?
No?

Of course I think you forgot one:

- The Solid Ham net: only signal reports, the weather, your rig, QTH, and if you are going out later... a directed net, no break-in.
(antenna height/type may be permitted on occasion)

Here's another one -

  The Doubling Net - two stations must be transmitting at the same time.

That's a funny list, Tom... ;D ;D


The Cappella Net:    (music with voice only - without instrumental accompaniment)

Everyone takes a turn and sings their best renditions of their favorite songs.

Suggestions for old buzzards - these are songs that I can sing, "amateur" quality. A back and forth, pause and finish the phrase singing QSO is invited:    I left my Heart in San Francisco,  Fly Me to the Moon,  MaCarthur's Park,  Sheeerrry - Shery Baby,  Me and Mrs. Jones,  Dancing Cheek to Cheek, Martha My Dear,  Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, Court of the Crimson King, White Christmas, Everybody Loves Somebody,  New York, New York, There's a Moon out tonight, Moonlight Serenade, With a Little Help From My Friends, Christmas Time is Here, Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire and many more of your own favorites.

This would be a scream for a real net, especially if there were some drinking going on.  It's amazing what a set of vocal chords can do other than just talk.

T

On the one hand I think the broadcasting of music by an amateur radio station is prohibited by FCC rules. On the other hand, I don't think what you're suggesting could be considered music...

It's probably on the borderline.  But who would care if there was a little fun?  For years Uncle Ed,WA3PUN and  Irb -  and a few others sang regularly on 75M. Uncle Ed had a very good, professional voice since he was "lead vocalist in the Wayne King Orchestra."

In the case of a net, I'll bet there are less than three guys who would dare sing a tune into the mic. (without a lot of prodding)  Might be renamed the Silent Net.   ;D

T

Yes, music is prohibited. Yes, it could be argued that some AM'ers singing is not music.

I hate to be superstitious, but Uncle Ed and Irb both met a terrible demise.

don't forget the good ole stand by; aches, pains and ailments net.  Though they are a dime a dozen on 75m on any given late night.

Over here on the left coast there are two nets that I know of.

West Coast AMI net

And their is a breakfast net in the Pacific Northwest of a few friends.  Probably 20 people or so. 

Wish propagation would return so we can talk again.  Nothing but noise most days and nights here.


--Shane
KD6VXI

The Carbon Mic Tone Deaf Net

Two activities:

First, the "Slam the Table" exercise to repack the granules.   Then the competition begins:  The winner must give detailed EQ adjustment advice to twenty-five carbon mic users in a row without losing his mind.   

T

My recommendation, a CW net using AM voice only. You need to mouth out the "Bah, bi-bi bah's."

Not to be confused with the speaking in tongues net.

Jon

I don’t want to get off topic, but did anyone ever hear a good carbon mic? 

And I watched the mini-series remake of Catch-22 recently.  Has anyone ever heard a throat-mic?  I haven’t. 

How about The Throat Mic Net?  Does anyone make a throat mic now?

Throat mics are cool.

I should’ve qualified my comment about the tongue talking net. FCC requires that all transmissions not be encrypted. If said amateur radio operator communicates via inspiration from divine sources, those transmissions are required to be translated into common English for the layman, hence the radio operator must also posses the gift of interpretation.

It’s a very difficult club to gain favor from.

Tough crowd.

Jon

As a kid, I had two of the aircraft carbon mics - T17 family I think they are; round vertical shaft, big button on the left. One was all black plastic, the other appeared to be cast aluminum body. I think I still have one

BUT I never saw one of the throat mics!

"    Has anyone ever heard a throat-mic?  "


Fair Radeo had 'em fer sale.

KLC

Throat mics are still a thing.

As mentioned, Fair has them.  https://fairradio.com/product/7800h/

Special Forces uses them.  Flyboys appear to use(d) them as well.

I've seen them advertised in the past, but I just don't think their is an amateur "need" for one?  Maybe for the militaria guys?

--Shane
KD6VXI


Edited to include link to Fair

The Wind Chime Net... now that the weather is getting cold.. why not bring those wind chimes in doors and put them on the air? Checkins can also include the sounds of dishes being washed... :D

Yes, good net suggestion Kevin!  I've been wanting to get a windchime set for the shack for a long time; not too tall - just the right size, with very good timbre; as important as choosing a good microphone.

After it starts, right click on the moving ball and loop it for all day annoyance:
https://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0366/4239/0147/files/BPMAS.mp3

To be inclusive.....


Black Robed Gangster Net


klc

Yes, I like the wind chime net idea, see who can wipe out the most adjacent QSO's with annoying sidebands! I guess that was Irb's idea. Just imagine a pile up of signals with wind chimes all transmitting at once. Somebody might come across it and think it was some kind of new digital  mode.
Larry

 I use wind chimes at both of my locations, especially now that I have Irb's Johnson KW on the air. Give them a good jangle and the guys with the spectrum displays freak out. They also are great retaliation towards certain people who intentionally run 40 KC wide or those insist on operating only 5 KC between AM QSO's.

How could I have forgotten -
The Old Buzzard TX Net - The longest TX I ever heard was 30 minutes.

Wind chines.

 Heck out Firedrake!

--Shane
KD6VXI

Then there is the one who drones on and on for 20 minutes or more and then says' "Well 73's , I have to go"  After boring the hell out of everyone else, signs off without doing the others the courtesy
of listening to their replies.  His time is more important than everyone else in the qso.

Deep Throat did!

I used to run The Boring Net. People left, it was too boring.

The The Missed Directed Net for hams who needed direction.

And the last net I ran was The Dead Net. I used to call up recently departed hams who went to the dark side. That net didn't last too long? No one ever came back to me on the call up???
 

These are all really interesing. Wind chimes are relaxing, and the sound of dishes being done means it's not my turn to do them  ;D

Carbon Mike Tone Deaf Net. I like that one! May as well use a carbon button telephone handset, good comms quality. Where's that box of nasty old microphones when it's wanted?

The Dead Net - Too creepy for me. Evil spirits might answer. Seance, ouija, divination, are forbiden here.
It could be a 'polite' way to hold the frequency for a little while and surely there are some people who might be interested enough in that sort of activity to pursue a ham license to try it.

The Kerchunker Net? Start off your turn and your transmitter with a contactor and/or a motor-generator set, etc. Obliged when leaving the net to sign-off by having some sort of burnout. Still inspired by Don on the loud contactor idea. IIRC he had a contactor mounted on a piece of wood and it was very audible.

With COVID-19 causing many (including my girlfriend) to cast a suspicious eye at microphones at karaoke singings, this sounds FB.  Luckily I try to keep in practice by singing in the car and shower.  ;D
 

With everything that ails me getting worse now, I'd fit right in. :P
 

"Ba-Ba-Baah, Ba-Ba-Bra-Ann?" (My late sister, named Barbara Ann, *hated* that song.)

I think we should have an Up-Against-the-Wall-Mother-Truckers net: it'll include classic Jefferson Airplane tunes like "Crown of Creation," "Volunteers," "Good Shepherd," and (of course) "White Rabbit!"

The Kerchunker Net? Start off your turn and your transmitter with a contactor and/or a motor-generator set, etc. Obliged when leaving the net to sign-off by having some sort of burnout. Still inspired by Don on the loud contactor idea. IIRC he had a contactor mounted on a piece of wood and it was very audible.

Up here in the Northeast, Jim, WA1UQM has one of the loudest, most authoritative contractor clunks on transmit ever heard.  I think he has something like a NEMA Size 3 3 phase contactor that doesn’t really do anything but make noise miked up the way the Red Sox Radio Network has the Green Monster at Fenway miked up for the Wall Balls.  In fact Jim’s ker-chunk  sounds very much like a Wall Ball.  Maybe it’s really just a sound bite he recorded off of WTIC Hartford!

Make that spelling "Gangsta"    ;D

The Hair Net":

Qualifications, you have to be at least 40 years old and still have some hair on your head, however, a beard will qualify you as an associate member.

Is everyone happy now?
Terry has his own organ thread.


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Tempted to write up some contest rules for that..

A couple of my favorites:

KA3OTT "Ott's"   No One's Allowed Net
A valid commentary on amateur radio's social structure.

-and of course-

"The Thanksgiving Weekend Homecoming Jamboree- not a contest but a fraternal homecoming"
Part of the ongoing pretext to occupy a frequency.
Classic 'VJZ "O.K. fine" and sometimes not so O.K.